My final memory of them was in their dining room. My Grandma had sat down in her seat for lunch, and wanted her coffee warmed up. My Grandpa was still up getting things ready for lunch, and said he would warm the coffee up for her. She asked him to put it in the microwave for “45 seconds on medium.” Click. The microwave is running. A few minutes later, the microwave is still humming along, and my Grandma asks my Grandpa (who is still puttering around getting his lunch ready), why the coffee is still in the microwave. “How long did you put it in for,” she asked, to which my Grandpa replied “3 minutes on high.”

“I told you to put it in for 45 seconds” my Grandma retorted.

“45 second? That wouldn’t even make it warm,” Grandpa replied.

At the time, this wasn’t a moment I knew would be a memory I would never forget. I was just a college kid visiting his grandparent. But to this day, whenever I microwave a cup of coffee, that memory pops into m head and I think of my grandparents.

Do you have a random moment like this that turned into an important memory?

I find it AMAZING that President Obama authorized the mission that would likely capture and kill Osama Bin Laden on Friday. I find it amazing that this mission was kept secret. And I find it AMAZING that Obama attended and was ‘normal’ at the correspondents dinner on Saturday night.

Think about that. He is cracking jokes at Trump and Fox News. He is having a comical time. Meanwhile, half a world away, there is a collection of US Troops performing a covert mission to seize the compound that Osama Bin Laden is at. The weight of knowing this mission was going on would have crippled me. I can barely work when the Brewers are playing a day game due to the distraction. Yet Obama knew that there was a decent chance, definitely the best chance since September 11, 2001, that Bin Laden would be caught. As much as anything I am amazed at the difficulty and complexity of being President.

This isn’t a job for reality TV stars. This is a job for the smartest, toughest, and brightest people in the country. Maybe this is a reminder.

Being a fairly liberal person, I don’t support Walker’s plan (I know, you are shocked). Still, I am not sure that democrats are best suited recalling Walker and the republicans in the Wisconsin state government. Let’s even assume democrats have the vote. Is recalling the governor really going to create a BETTER system?

Here is my argument against recalling Walker, and other republicans in one word: precedent. Do any democrats look ahead and think of what might happen once a democratic governor is back in the state capital? Won’t republicans instantly try to recall him/her once the administration tries to pass a liberal bill? If Walker is recalled I fear a precedent will be set that whenever the minority loses the election the recall effort will start, and that simply isn’t how democracy is supposed to work. Like the filibuster (a tool created with good intentions but is completely and utterly misused), recalling political leaders will turn into the new ‘go to’ tool to get your way when it democratically just isn’t your turn.

Instead of spending energy and resources on recalling current political leaders for whom liberals disagree with, perhaps their efforts would be better used figuring out what it exactly is they stand for and creating a consistent message. Perhaps they are better suited moving full speed into the 2012 election, which given the Citizens United ruling and other republicans measures to slant the political landscape, is going to be as tough as any of my lifetime.

I want Walker and his cronies out of office just as much as anyone. I just don’t want to start the pattern of a constant series of recalls. Our politicians already spend WAY too much time campaigning for their next election and not enough time tackling the problems they were elected to figure out. So unless democrats vow they won’t try to recall republicans leaders for say, 25 years, I say just let this current administration run their course and not waste the political capital.

We are a country of immigrants. Immigrants, our ancestors, that flocked to this country because it was the land of opportunity. It was one of, if not the only, countries in the world where hard work could lead to a rising social-economic status. Historian James Truslow Adams said, “The American Dream is that dream of a land in which life should be better and richer and fuller for every man, with opportunity for each according to ability or achievement.” This ideal shaped the culture and life of Americans for many years.

Now, that ideal seems to be dead. Now it seems the American Dream is to suffer an inconvenience  and sue the crap out of someone so that you can capitalize on an inconvenience and never work another day in your life. What brings this to mind is the stupidity of the people suing the NFL because of the seating situation at the Super Bowl. Yes it stinks that fans paid, got all excited about attending the Super Bowl, and then didn’t get to see the game because the NFL screwed up BIG TIME, but how much is that inconvenience worth? How can anyone argue that missing the Super Bowl is worth more than what the NFL is currently offering these people? IT IS A FOOTBALL GAME! But why be rational when you can pay some crackpot lawyer to attempt to hoover as much money as possible out of the situation? Why not try to make this a public relations nightmare for the NFL, which doesn’t need any added PR issues with labor issues threatening next season, and make a small mint out of your inconvenience? $2,400 a seat, triple face value, isn’t enough. Heck no. These dillholes need to chase the new American Dream: suffer an inconvenience and sue the crap out of someone so you never have to work another day in your life. No where in the new American Dream is hard work, talent, or anything resembling those values. Just get lucky. Hope you get sick so you can go to the doctor and sue them because they cannot magically cure you. Hope you get fired so you can sue for wrongful termination. Those are much easier than ACTUALLY earning the money.

Do you remember the movie Office Space? There was a character named Tom Smykowski who lived the new American Dream, albeit a little more of an inconvenience than missing the Super Bowl. He was hit by a car and was as excited as someone that won the lottery. I wonder how many people would willingly be smacked by a car, suffer serious but non-life-threatening injuries, if that meant that never had to work another day in their life. After all, that is the new American Dream. Screw hard work. Screw putting in your time. Screw ability or talent. Just get smacked by a car or inconvenienced at a sporting event, that is a MUCH easier route to financial superiority.

Take the current bastardization (pretty sure that isn’t a word, but I am going with it) of the English language being supported by Facebook, Twitter, and text messaging. Saying what is on your mind in as few words or characters is a skill is these mediums. Great. But people need to realize that this skill needs to have an on/off switch. Your résumé shouldn’t look like you wrote it via text message or with the same language you use for a Facebook update. This seems obvious, but as someone that sees hundreds of résumés a week, I promise you this isn’t.

The same goes with how we speak. There is casual conversation, there is professional conversation, and formal conversation. When you are speaking to people of importance perhaps you should limit the ‘ums,’ ‘likes,’ and curse words, maybe? Again, you think this would be obvious, but the stupidity and unawareness of people is amazing. Just the other day I was speaking with a job candidate and he told me he ‘…would work his balls off for me.’ REALLY!? You think that is a good quality? Sure, you might be trying to explain to me that you are a hard worker. Super. All I see is that you lack the awareness needed to succeed at life. Same goes with cursing. In almost 6 months of working in the world of talent acquisition I am shocked by the lack of awareness of job seekers when it comes to cursing.

And as the written and spoken language sink into the abyss, people’s ability to dress appropriately for the situation is also lacking. Often I see companies promoting more comfortable dress codes for employees, presumably to promote a more comfortable working environment. But, like so much in our culture, if you give an inch a mile is taken. Business casual soon leads to tennis shoes and sweatshirts. Which is fine if your company/organization goes for it, but suddenly people are asking if they need to wear a tie for the job interview because they can’t differentiate casual Friday and a job interview.

A piece of advice: learn that casualness is something that must have an on/off switch. Learn how to speak. Learn how to write. Be aware of which situations are professional, which are formal, and which are casual. Then adapt your language and demeanor to FIT that situation. Don’t go with the ‘this is who I am, this is how I speak like it or not’ strategy. That leads to chronic unemployment and underemployment. Strive for more and you might be surprised where you can get in this world.

Nothing like a good excuse to post a wedding picture. Such a happy and good looking couple.

The “when are you going to have children?” started LITERALLY hours after Katie and I said I do. I was mingling, as a good groom is supposed to, at our wedding reception and one of my new extended in-laws asked me, in all sincerity, “so when are you going to start having children?” I just smiled and played along, although a part of me wanted to discuss the absurdity of the idea that now that we are married, babies should be here any day. SLOW DOWN. Perhaps we should have placed a table tent on everyone’s table that explained why they shouldn’t be too exited about babies in the near future…

Katie works 80 hours a week. No really, she works 80 hours a week. Not like most people say they work a lot. She ACTUALLY works a lot. She legally cannot work more than 80 hours a week. When your job has to make a rule preventing you from working more than 80 hours you know you work a lot. She simply doesn’t have the time to be a mom, and I do not have the skill, patience, or ability to be a dad without constant backup. Did I mention I have never in my life changed a diaper? I don’t even like HOLDING babies. I am half-tempted (not really, don’t worry Josh or Jason) to just drop the next baby that is thrusted into my arms to hold just so people will stop demanding I hold them. The seeming fragility of a baby (and parents will say they are tough, but I don’t buy it) freaks me out.

And equally important, we just want to enjoy being married for a bit. Granted, the above point gets in the way of any sense of normalcy, but there is something to be said about living life without having a baby soaking up most of your time.

And things were fine post wedding. This is likely due to the fact that we don’t see many people (did I mention that Katie works a lot?), and that my family gets it. But now EVERYONE around us is having babies. Seriously. Seems that every female Katie interacts with is pregnant or has a newborn. Seems many of my friends, not to mention my new boss, are in similar situations. Which is great and fantastic if not for the glowing and yearning look babies and baby talk installs onto Katie’s face. I thought only puppies could make Katie smile that wide and force her voice up a few octaves, but evidently babies are starting to do that now too.

Contrary to popular belief, I am excited to have children and be a dad—just not yet. And I am sure you are never REALLY ready, I just know that I am not at all ready yet. I would miss having free time. Would miss being able to get up and watch soccer on Saturday mornings. Would miss being able to come home to a mostly quiet house (you should hear Lucy squeak for wet food!). And perhaps most of all I am just not ready for my life to revolve around children. I am still too selfish, apparently, for that.

So for all of you wondering, relax or you are going to be wondering for awhile (hopefully).

Seriously, we all need to grow up. Everyone. Me, you, everyone.

We need to stop wasting our time, energy, and resources throwing barbs and hatred at each other. We have to realize that just because you disagree doesn’t mean you have to hate the person  you disagree with. There isn’t right/wrong on most issues. Life just isn’t that simple. Currently we seem to believe there is “my view” and anyone who disagrees is evil. This just isn’t the case. We all wish it were, but it isn’t.

Here is my wish. I wish we could spend our time and efforts fixing real problems. I wish we could all use this tragedy to take a step back and look at the big picture. Hell, let’s take seven or eight steps back and take a look at the big picture.

Regardless of race, class, religious, or whatever other tools unite and divide us, we can agree that our country faces issues that are sucking the remaining soul we have right out of us. We can disagree the severity of issues and solutions, but we can at least agree that issues exist, right?

I can promise you that one of those issues ISN’T the language used in Huck Finn. One of those issues ISN’T where Barack Obama was born. Really, we spend too much time bitching about things that don’t really matter. Barack Obama isn’t a communist tyrant, I promise. He isn’t Hitler anymore than George W. Bush was (hint: neither were). High speed rail from Chicago to Milwaukee to wherever isn’t the greatest or worst idea ever.

Remember during the 2008 election when everyone was discussing Rev. Wright? Everyone was concerned about this insane pastor that preached at a church that Obama went to, remember? Was Wright crazy? Maybe. But the funny part was that (and part of this might be opinion, I apologize) Obama couldn’t confront the question of ‘how could he sit in that church every Sunday?’ with the honest answer of “well, frankly, I rarely if ever went to church because I am not that religious” because people would go bat-shit crazy about a President who doesn’t at least pretend to be religious. During that same election we were concerned about flag pins and other stupid things. These are issues only because we as a country are too immature to care about real issues. I have much more respect for someone I disagree with and can actually formulate a reason than someone who tells me Barack Obama is a communist, socialist, liberty-hating tyrant (he isn’t, I promise).

And I will put myself out there and say I have been just as stupid. One fact about Scott Walker that pisses me off (there are more, most of which have substance) is that he is a college drop out. Yes, I think the governor of a state should at least have a college education, but in the end that doesn’t really matter. What matters is a persons ability to lead. You might be a Marquette dropout, but that doesn’t matter in the end.

Back to the point…

I wish America would grow up. I wish we could put an end to the rating-driven rhetoric, stupidity, and political theatre that has replaced anything resembling national discourse. I will be honest, I am 28 and barely remember the Clinton administration… But I cannot imagine our current political climate is ‘normal.’ And yes I believe that 90% of the anger and hate is driven by the media and actors within the political theatre. I believe Rush Limbaugh has made more money than I could ever count feeding the fire of senseless debate. I am sure liberals do it to, although not as effectively, but as a liberal I am not as great at picking those out—sue me. I will admit they exist, and definitely existed during the Bush years.

I wish, oh do I wish, that the jackasses (sorry for the language in the post, but I feel it

reflects my frustration) ruining our country would apologize. I wish Sharron Angle would walk up to a microphone and say “you know what, I really messed up when I called for ‘2nd amendment solutions.” I wish people would care much less about how a politician looks, how they smell, or where they go to church and start to actually care about what they think. We need more actual conversation like this:

Me: I think credit default swaps are stupid, senseless tools that add little to nothing to society and the economy. They should be made illegal.

Someone who disagrees: I think credit default swaps are an import tool because [insert some argument here that defends credit default swaps].

People always complain that government stinks and that politicians are corrupt dillholes. You know why? Because we elect them! We care way too much about flag pins, religion, and whatever else.

We need less fear and anger. Less hate. More conversation. Heaven forbid there ever be a news show, blog, or newspaper that provides facts and news as opposed to partisan sludge. Heaven forbid we start to demand that our leaders actually answer questions as opposed to the canned, rehearsed garbage we get now.  We should expect more of each other, and more from our leaders. Why not? Why not let this tragedy serve as a wake up call?

Anyways. I will shut up. I am sure this makes little to no sense. I am even more sure that I am not alone in this. Jon Stewart had a great piece on this, and per usual sums up the situation better than I could ever come close to doing. Watch the video. Share your comments. Whatever works.

But today, despite my eyeballs desire to not look at the computer screen after sourcing hundreds of résumés all day, I finally am sitting down to share something I think some of my peers might relate to.

I love Christmas, but this year more than ever I realize I am not the target audience for Christmas anymore. This striking reality has slowly been approaching. I remember the agony of my first post-college Christmas and the horror of having to work in December. You mean everyone doesn’t get two weeks off in Winter? And that was the year I had fun items like video games on my Christmas list, and my parent’s main gift to me was a tool set. Sure the tool set was great, but what was I going to waste my time playing with over the next few miserable winter months? I wasn’t read for logical and useful gifts. Sure I still use the tools my dad picked out, but that was the beginning of the end. It was the sign of something greater even if I was too naïve or stupid to realize at the time.

This year seems to be the beginning of a new chapter. For starters, my wife is working on Christmas. Enjoying Christmas Day is difficult when your wife is working overnight from the 24th-25th and then again the 25th-26th.

ah, me at a younger and cuter age when life was much more simple. Many things have change, except the team on the hat.

Most notable on my ‘this is the end of Christmas as you have known it’ is the fact that my parents are coming to MY HOUSE. Sure I will still drive to their house on Christmas Day, but the day after Katie and I are hosting them. Yikes! Having a house is scary enough, hosting your parents and grandparents is something I am not prepared for yet.

I write about the end of Christmas because I feel the full-blown transition into adulthood upon me. Not the transition to parenthood, just adulthood. Life isn’t about what it used to be about. I don’t define joy the same way. For example, I have missed more Packer games this season than any I can remember because I am spending time with Malik. Younger Phillip would NEVER have done that. I drink four beers and am hung over the next day. Old Phillip would NEVER have felt that way. I remember going for morning jogs with my friend Ankur after solid nights of drinking. Values and views change (not political views, don’t worry). And my role in things has changed. I see myself embarking on a career, as opposed to just spinning my wheels at University of Phoenix. Life is just different this year, and it scares the crap out of me.

I cannot be alone in this view. Others feel like that too, right? That suddenly, or not so suddenly, we are adults? We are expected to make adult decisions and do adult things?

Granted, I write this after a night of playing Wii bowling and sword fighting with my friend Bob while my wife wrapped his Christmas presents… But still.

Black Friday, the Friday after Thanksgiving, is a tradition for many just like the turkey at the Thanksgiving table. For those that have never experienced Black Friday, I would encourage you to at least go once for the pure experience. If you don’t want to go to shop, go to at least people watch, because that is entertainment enough!

The night before starts with a review of the newspaper in order to review the ads scoping out

Obviously this is the sane way to purchase that Kodak EasyShare camera.

the appropriate path to take. After that, it is home to prepare for the next day’s festivities.

This year, I dropped my husband off at work at 5:00 a.m. and departed towards Indiana for my day of shopping. A day without children, a day of shopping, a day of spending money. As I drop him off at work we passed a mall with parking lots full of cars and anxious shoppers. Already I was behind on getting the good deals. My husband commented how crazy these people must be and thought we were all insane. I smiled and kept driving!

We arrived at the first location and it was amazing to see the “themes”. Mother and daughter duos with matching T-Shirts that say “Shop until you Drop”, and others representing generations of shoppers with matching shirts. It was amazing. We don’t go that far in our Black Friday festivities, but it is neat to see all the individuals that get so engrossed in the shopping.

The meca location for Black Friday is Toys-R-Us. This place is ridiculous. To check out, at 9 a.m., was a 25 minute wait. While walking through the store you could tell those that were the serious and had been up since the early hours waiting in the 30 degree weather. While doing more observations you could tell those that had a game plan. They knew where things were in store and had their ads in the back pocket looking for that one item. The part that got me was the amount of males that were out shopping! While out looking for items I ran into a lady…literally. I apologized and she said no worries. If these men would get out of my way we would all be better off. Why would you bring a male out shopping on a day like today anyways? Right then I knew I liked her. There are just some days when males should really just realize that they don’t belong somewhere. Kind of like a woman in a males locker room…might be permissible, but there is just something wrong with it. Toys-R-Us was also the first store that we got into an argument with management of the store. No Black Friday is completely without an argument or a negotiation with management. One other note, and a key to making shoppers happy, is to please have the bathrooms at shopping locations well stocked and smelling good. This bathroom at Toys-R-Us was terrible and it made for some very aggravating females! Just a side note.

After all of the Toys-R-Us activities, it was then time to eat! This is another great Black Friday phenom. Doors open at 11am at most locations. All restaurants are like opening a buffet to a beginning Weight Watchers group…there is an onslaught of hungry shoppers ready to eat, eat quickly, regroup your shopping list, and plan out the rest of the shopping day. The second half. This year we went to the Olive Garden. Immediately I knew we were in trouble and I was going to have trouble keeping my mouth shut. Everyone around us had drinks. Most had already gotten their orders taken, and some even had their salads and breadsticks. We had nothing, hadn’t even seen our server yet. Not a good start. So I flagged down a manager and explained to him that we had not been acknowledged. All we wanted was soup, salad, and an appetizer. The manager said he would take our order. Perfect. Then another gentleman came over, he said it was his first experience working Black Friday. Still no excuse, but I cut him a little slack. He took our drink order and came back with a little old, white haired lady. She moved the speed of smell and it appeared to be her first day working. We finally got our food, but when it came to the bill, she bought the wrong one too us. See, on Black Friday, we don’t like mistakes; we don’t like people to be slow. Because every minute you are waiting for something or someone, somebody else is getting that last item off the shelve that is supposed to be yours!

Quick note: on Black Friday’s, please, PLEASE drive with the flow of traffic. Slow drivers are annoying and stand a good chance of getting run over.

Our next stop was the mall where the greatest thing of the day took place. The mall was valet parking! Normally I would just fight for a parking spot, flip a few people off that take my spot before I can get to it, or cut me off getting to it, but this year I decided $6 was a good price to have my car parked and not waste half a tank of gas looking for a spot. Not only did they park your car, but half of the money they collected went to charity, and they would run your bags out to your car for free! It was amazing. And well work the fee and the tipping!

We ended up finishing our shopping trip at the Cheesecake Factory for some delicious cheesecake! Another rule to Black Friday, is you eat just as much as you shop!

Now the 2010 Black Friday is complete and we wait another 365 days to experience it all again. As females, we just look at it as a chance for us to all come together to better the economy.

Out of date Jerseys and T-Shirts

Don’t wear a jersey, or t-shirt jersey, for a player not on the team. The only exception is obviously players that are legends. You see this the most at Brewers games. Fans walk in with their J.J. Hardy or Carlos Lee shirts… GET A NEW SHIRT. I realize that everyone cannot afford, or doesn’t prioritize their Brewers shirts to the level I do. Simple solution to that—don’t buy a shirt that is attached to a player if you aren’t willing to replace the shirt after that player is no longer on the team. If you can afford to come to the game you can afford the $15 for a  new shirt. And if you can’t then just wear a regular shirt. Yes, I would rather you wear a non-Brewers shirt than a JJ Hardy shirt.

Fire the Coach

The idea that firing the coach is always the answer is one that simply baffles me. Every time a team loses you hear fans screaming for the coach to be fired. When Wisconsin lost to Michigan State earlier in the year fans were going insane calling for Bret Bielema to be fired. Yet here the Badgers are ranked as the top one loss team in the country staring the Rose Bowl right in the face. We can debate Bielema another time, but really, who would take over if he were fired? They are finishing what might be their best season EVER.

Just relax. The coach is occasionally the problem (see the Vikings and Brad Childress), but the coach isn’t always the problem, or even usually. The owner is the problem much more than the coach, the coach is just easier to get rid of.I think teams would benefit more from sticking with a coach and establishing some sense of continuity. Allow the team to establish a lasting identity.

Deceiving the Referee

As a soccer fan, this drives me crazy. I hate diving. I hate players rolling around on the ground like they are passing a kidney at that very moment. I hate that. But players do that in EVERY sport, and it drives me crazy in ALL sports. Basketball players do it trying to draw fouls. Football players do it trying to draw the flag, especially on pass interference. Baseball you see less of it, but then again Derek Jeter paraded around after a supposed ‘hit by pitch’ that didn’t hit him, but rather hit his BAT (isn’t that the point of the game?). Just play the game. Play it well. You can never expect games to be officiated well if players are putting forth an effort to deceive them. There is simply too much going on. I wish fans would be more critical of player’s efforts to draw fouls and deceive the referee.

Random Fans

I believe that the teams you support should make something resembling sense. I realize with TV packages you can now watch any team’s game and follow them as if a local fan. . Still, I believe that you should either root for your home team, or a team you have ties to. If your dad is a Mets fan, but your family was transplanted, fine. That obviously makes sense. What I don’t understand are people who support a hodge-podge of teams and then pretend that their fan-dom is the same. Sorry, but if you live in North Carolina and just decided to support the Packers I don’t care how long you have been a fan, it isn’t the same. You can be a real fan, but it isn’t the same. Support whomever you want, just know that your vote/support counts for less if you don’t have that direct tie to the team.

And let the record show I am seriously guilty of this as a soccer fan. My favorite team, Bayern Munich, plays in GERMANY. I would never in a MILLION years compare my support of the team to people there. It isn’t even close, despite similar followings of the team. Just living within it means something.

Hating Soccer

This one is simple. You don’t have to like soccer, just please stop wasting your energy hating it. Same with hockey, or NASCAR, or whatever else. Let people enjoy what they enjoy. You can be neutral. You can simply say ‘I don’t like that sport,’ but stop going out of your way to hate and share your hatred of a sport. That is just annoying. You can dislike something and still respect it. That is the right thing to do.

Your Fantasy Team

By all means, play fantasy sports if you want to. Go crazy, but please remember the rest of us don’t care about your team at all. Few things irk me more than listening to some ‘fan’ start explaining that they want the Packers to win, but want Devin Hester to have a good game… Or that they want the Brewers to win, but hope that Ryan Howard hits a home run. Annoying.